It’s not always easy to say no to a boss, a colleague or a friend at work. My clients are often torn between their workload, the number of hours they would like to work and their ambitions. They say “yes” more often because they don’t want to look bad, or feel obligated. There’s nothing wrong with it: my clients are committed people who love and aim for results. For some, saying no represents non-collaboration for them and this is not what they want to exude.
With this type of client, one of the strategies I apply is to establish the image they want to project (and why!), and then we establish a plan that corresponds to their ambition by including various healthy ways to achieve their goals.
A habit is to learn to say no without making enemies 🙂
Do you have one or more of the following symptoms?
- Stress : Are you overworked? Having trouble managing your time?
- Lack of energy : You accumulate frustrations… and it undermines you?
- Difficulties in gaining respect : Do you feel that you are being abused, or that your role is not respected?
- Responsibilities : Do you feel responsible for a lot? Do you tend to take too much on your shoulders?
If you recognize yourself, even a little, take action.
To what extent do you agree with the statements below:
- You can’t say no to a boss.
- You can’t say no to someone who has already done you a favor.
- You can’t say no to someone with whom you have a personal connection.
- You can’t say no to someone who has been referred to us.
If you agree with at least one statement, what do you think about:
Saying no to a request is not saying no to a person.
The 7 steps to say no without making enemies?
Imagine yourself in a situation where someone comes to you and you know that you will have a hard time saying no. Follow these steps:
- Look at the person, smile, and ask questions to fully understand the request. For example: What are their expectations of you? For when?
- Ask her how long it will take for her to respond.
- Reassure her that you will get back to her in time.
- Evaluate the request. How long does this request require on your part?
- Test how this request fits into your current priorities and tasks.
- Decide if you can respond affirmatively to this request.
- Communicate your answer
If no :
-
- Tell the person that you want to help them, but that unfortunately at this time you can’t do it because of your current load.
- Ask the person who else or what could help? Offer someone else, or a tool.
How to make a transition from “I-rarely-say-no” to “I-say-no-to-need”
Do you find my approach interesting, but not from there to do it?
Start by choosing a person, the one with whom you feel it will be the easiest.
Go ahead, get started!